Catharsis

At the risk of causing offence, the world would be easier to navigate if everybody was just nice. Normally, I hate the word 'nice' - it covers all manner of sins, and was on the 'banned' list in my primary school English class. However, to be 'nice' would just about sum up how people should behave to one another, I feel. Not overtly generous, or polite, or kind, or compassionate...just plain old nice would do for me.

It seems that every day, people are so worried about offending, or upsetting somebody, or their words being misconstrued, that their whole personality becomes determined by the people they see. For example, I know people I could readily mock all day long, and they would return this two-fold, and that would be fine. We would laugh, and know that no offence is meant, and the conversation is all in the manner of good-fun. With other friends, I am the shoulder-to-cry-on...the sponge that soaks up all their worries and concerns, and spews out endless sympathies and advice. This is also fine, and the self-obsessed side of me likes feeling that I'm doing the good-turn (yes, I went to Brownies). However, with other people, it seems that I can be myself and it's not ok. I can be myself slightly altered and it's still not ok. I can be a whole-new-alien-person and it's STILL not ok. At the risk of my blog turning into one big rant, I am always told to just be yourself, and if people don't like it they know where to go. This seems to be the general rule which has been passed down through my family, through magazines, friends, teachers, doctors etc. etc. etc.

A point which I really believe, as I sit on the brink of final-year university education, is that you should not just accept yourself, but enjoy being who you are. It sounds so cliche, I know, but if you don't like yourself, nobody else is going to leap in and tell you how wonderful you are. Self-love has a lot to be said for it. Of course, egotistical and arrogant attributes of self-love often surface, and those, in my opinion, should be readily thrown out of the proverbial window. However, instead of absorbing criticism which is neither constructive nor given to help or advise you, maybe it is better to fill your ears with a buzzing sound and hum absently, until such 'advice-givers' have left the building. Really, what is the point of sitting down and having somebody voice how truly terrible a person you are? Surely, it is the most aggressive form of therapy, and unless you want to pay somebody to tear you apart, why bother? Just accept that yes, you may not be perfect, but this is fine, it is good, it is actually great, because why would we all want to be perfect? There would be no need for bitching over coffee!

So, to be nice would just be wonderful. Just for a day, or an hour even - if people didn't give significant cold stares, and pointedly leave conversations hanging awkwardly - how refreshing that would be. Of course, in that hour of niceness, I'm sure a huge backlog of hatred would build, exploding with the force of a nuclear attack and rendering everybody a quivering mess of self-loathing. In which instance, it is probably not the best idea. But one to bear in mind, should I need a good old clear-out.